Tag Archives: skills

Building New Skills

Posted on by
Reply

Much of our frustration with personal development comes from our failure to establish short term goals.  This frustration springs from a failure to understand that the learning and development of skills is typically an evolutionary process.  Your brain learns by building neural connections over time, by way of practice and integration into your current understandings and skills.

Maybe you want to learn to play a musical instrument. The first day you pick up the instrument, you will not play it like a virtuoso.  You correct for this by expecting a certain level of accomplishment for each practice.  Meeting this goal gives you a positive view of your efforts.  You repeat this cycle over and over again, like climbing a ladder.

The excuse, “It’s too hard”, is usually based upon unrealistic daily or weekly goals. It is exceptionally difficult to eat the elephant in one bite.  You have to break it down into manageable pieces.

Another example might be reading a text book.  Your goal for the week may be, “I need to know Chapter 5 for a test this Friday”, but what is today’s goal, tomorrow’s goal, and so on?  If you want to feel good about your progress, divide and conquer the material.

  • I need to understand section 5.1, Monday.
  • I need to understand sections 5.1 and 5.2, Tuesday.
  • I need to understand sections 5.1, 5.2 and 5.3, Wednesday.
  • I need to understand sections 5.1, 5.2, 5.3 and 5.4, Thursday.
  • I need to be ready to take the test Friday at 2 PM.

This process allows you to feel a sense of accomplishment every day. Your focus is on what you need to accomplish right now, instead of what is needed for the entire week.  A smaller bite yields a less stressful and more fulfilling experience.  It also allows the pieces of the material you are learning right now to “sink in” before you learn the next piece (text books are written around this type of learning model).

Here is how you do it. If I am asking for 3 ½ hours of your time per week to work on something, that is only 30 minutes a day.  Thirty minutes a day is easier to manage than 3 ½ hours at one time, and it is more effective.

If you are learning golf, taking a long trip, learning a new skill, etc., break the whole into pieces. Then you can knock them out one at a time until you reach your goal.  This involves living in the moment.

  • In golf, you can’t hit the ball like a pro, who is hitting at least 100 practice balls a day, by hitting 50 competition balls a week.
  • You can only drive the stretch of road you are on, no matter how much you want to think about the last mile of your trip.
  • You break old habits, and form new habits, by repetitive actions and thoughts.
  • You learn new skills by practice.

You can institutionalize imperfection by practicing something imperfectly, thereby making a bad habit.  You can institutionalize perfection by practicing something perfectly, thereby making a good habit.  Have you ever seen someone with perfect form, great patience, or great instincts?  They got there by way of perfect practice. The training of their mind and body to accomplish the goal right in front of them.

Personal Motivation

Posted on by
5

Personal motivation has 4 components:

  • Belief in purpose
  • Belief in process
  • Belief in self
  • Definition of success

Belief in purpose is about having a reason to want to achieve a goal or objective. What is the burning “Yes” in your life that makes you want to be successful?  For some it is our families, for others it may be a desired life style or a cause we are passionate about. In any case, you have to know what it is.  I am not talking about head knowledge in this case.  It is heart knowledge you need.

Belief in process moves you from the purpose of your efforts to an understanding, and adherence to, a methodology for achieving your goals. This means knowing what sacrifices it will take to achieve your goals and what map you will follow.

A good friend of mine gave me this advice a long time age. He said “find the person who is the most successful at doing the things you want to do and learn from them”. Let go of your preconceived notions, open your mind and learn.  At the same time don’t lose sight of what you value. In other words, don’t use a map to success that compromises your values. For example, you can get rich taking advantage of others, but you will lose the richness of self.

Belief in self is about seeing yourself being successful. Visualization is a key ingredient. Successful people see themselves in a positive light and visualize what success looks like. A successful hitter in baseball goes to the plate expecting to get a hit and seeing the event in their mind’s eye. Visualizing failure is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

People who do not believe that they deserve to be successful, or doubt their abilities, are doomed to a lower level of success. “I can’t do it, so why try.” The first person to convince is you. If you don’t believe, neither will anyone else. Conversely, if you do believe, others will follow.

A definition of success allows you to measure your performance. It involves answering two questions.

  • What does success for me look like?
  • How do I measure my performance?

This success component is important because we sometimes set our definition of success too high or too low. It is best to set up a series of smaller step goals that take you toward a larger goal. This way you can celebrate your success along the way.  It is the difference between running 5 miles every day for a week or just showing up on Saturday and trying to run 35 miles all at one time.

Your definition of success will tie directly into your belief in purpose. If not, you will be lost in the jungle of life, making the wrong choices and expending precious time and energy being successful at things that do not take you where you want to go. For example, if your 5 year plan is to become financial independent, going into debt for the “status” car may not be your best decision.

This is a personal journey.  You must make your own choices as you move through life. Getting your life into focus using the ideas above will allow you to move with purpose. Not getting things into focus will cause you to be like drift wood, tossed about by the forces of life, going nowhere on purpose and everywhere by accident.