A positive attitude is essential to success in any endeavor.  We all know this, but generally fail to see that our lives are punished by negativity from every side. We receive nearly 100 negative messages for every positive message everyday.  If you don’t believe me, run your own test. Just keep a tally as you go through the day.

Consider the following. These are all points in the various commercials you will see on television. 

You need to lose weight.

You need more hair.

You need help raising your children.

You need to be smarter.

You need help managing your money.

You have this problem that you have never heard of before and did not know you had.

Consider the news.  Negativity attracts viewers. Viewer loading sells advertisements and the news is about profiting from advertisements.  In listening to the headlines, how many emphasize the positive side of issues.  It is the negative side that gets the juices flowing.

All of this skews our perspectives.  I recently spoke to a high school student who gave me the following punch list of goals:

I am going to avoid making bad grades.

I am not going to hang with the wrong crowd.

I am going to avoid getting detention.

These are all negative statements that are meant to describe positive outcomes.  I advised the student to adjust their perspective and restate their goals:

I am going to make good grades.  The higher the better.

I am going to hang with the top performers in my school.  Especially those who are trying to accomplish the same things as I am.

I am going to try to make a positive impact on everyone I interface with.

The negative goals are based on avoidance.  The positive expressions of those same goals are based on accomplishment.

Here’s the back story.  Negativity is an addiction.  It is an addiction that is pushed on us in order to control how we think and feel, how we spend our time and money, how we vote, etc.  Remember that when someone is spending time and money to reach out to you with negativity, they are really practicing the art of persuasion.  They are looking for a return on their investment of time and money. That return is manifested in control over various aspects of your life.

 How do you keep your compass sent on true North? It is a matter of taking control of your internal voice.

You decide who you are and your worth.

You decide what needs to change in your life.

You chose to educate yourself about what and why you believe.  Don’t take someone else’s word for it.

You decide who you are going to associate with or listen to.

Here are the practical steps to independence from negativity:

Minimize the time spent watching the news. Don’t become addicted to the negative.  Look for the needed information and avoid the spin makers. You need the information, but not the spin.

Surround yourself with positive people. These individuals become enablers in your life. If you were choosing sides for a game, you would select persons that would help you succeed.  This is no different.

Run from negative people or associations. They can only hurt you or keep you from success in your life. 

Practice positive self talk. This is related to the high school student I mentioned above.  What you say to yourself is more helpful, or hurtful, than anything said by someone else. My dad used to say that if you are saying it, you are thinking it, and at some level you believe it.

Turn the lemons in your life into lemonade.  Take action to overcome the obstacles in your life. Want to overcome depression?  Take action, even if it is a small step.  I have found that the majority of the lemons in my life were able to be made into lemonade with a shift in paradigm.

Make a positive impact on others in your life.  Simply put, it is hard to be negative when you are being positive.  Have you ever noticed how good you feel when you are doing something positive for someone?

Change the things you can and accept the things you can’t. Remember the Serenity Prayer? “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Use your strengths to propel your life forward and overcome your weaknesses. Focusing on your weaknesses makes you weak. Focusing on your strengths makes you strong.