The death of a significant other is life changing. The vector of this change will depend more upon you than anyone else. You will be living with the aftermath for the rest of your life. Consider the following questions regarding the death of someone important to you.

Have you left anything unsaid that needs to be said?

Have you sought to forgive and be forgiven?

Have you made peace of mind possible?

The weeks leading up to my father’s death were some of the closest times we ever had. We spent time discussing life, death, and life after death for both my father and myself. I was able to give him peace of mind regarding my mother and brother. He was able to give me peace of mind regarding my role in his life and that of my son.

I can tell you that without a doubt, neither of us left anything unsaid. The result was that we both focused on our lives and our life impacts right up to the end. He did not want to die, but he felt free to let go when the time came. For my part, I have all this in my heart in a way that keeps my father real to me years later.

What about your own death? Are you prepared? Have you prepared others? Consider these questions.

Have you sought to forgive and be forgiven?

Have you left anything unsaid that needs to be said?

Have you done all that you want to do in life?

Have you made peace of mind possible?

As cliché as this sounds, you have to life your life as if the end could come anytime. Being prepared means having your life in order, having your relationships in order, and having things in place to impact your loved ones in a positive way after you pass.

What I learned from my dad was how important his life would be to his family years after his passing. No one lives forever in the flesh, but your impact on others lives far beyond your death. Many of his decisions, made a decade earlier, make perfect sense now, even if they didn’t then. Let me give you an example from someone’s else’s life.

A friend of mine, who recently lost his father to Alzheimer’s, found that his father wrote a letter to his family years earlier while he still could think clearly. The letter was to be opened and read after he passed. It was important to him that everything got said that needed to be said. The letter was a bridge to peace of mind for his family. It made a difference.

Ephesians 4:26 says to not let the sun go down upon your wrath. This is good advice to anyone to whom peace of mind is important. I would also advise to not let the sun go down without having told those you love that you love them.

One last thing. Don’t put off living your life to some later date when things are “better”. That time may never come. In fact, I believe that you can make choices to make things better or worse all by yourself, at anytime. I chose to live life by the thickest slice possible. If I choke, I choke. At least I will know the possibilities. I am not speaking about wealth in dollars here. It is the wealth in love, happiness and peace of mind that counts. That is priceless.